As civil unrest over police brutality and racism in the U.S. continues across the country, many people are turning their ire onto statues and monuments that celebrate some of the nation’s most famous racists, including Confederate generals, slave owners, and generally bad people. Conservatives, ever concerned with preserving history unless it’s in our public textbooks, have been pearl-clutching hardcore over seeing their heroes toppled to the ground like that.
This includes Matt Schlapp, American Conservative Union chairman and Fox News contributor, who worried that statues of Jesus Christ are “next.”
Statues of Jesus are next. It won't end. Pray for the USA— Matt Schlapp (@mschlapp) June 22, 2020
If you’re worried about Touchdown Jesus, don’t be. That already burned down from a lightning strike in 2010. Isn’t there something in the Bible about God not being a fan of statues?
As for the other statues of Jesus across the country, Black Lives Matter protesters have not indicated anywhere that these particular idols will be targeted for removal. At the very least, there are still plenty of Confederate monuments and statues of other racists that would need to go first.
Jesus doesn’t care if you knock down statues of Jesus.— God (@thegoodgodabove) June 22, 2020
He cares about people not having food or medicine.
Many have reassured Schlapp by saying that since Jesus was a Black man hunted and murdered by the state, tearing down his statue in support of a movement against state violence upon Black lives doesn’t make much sense.
Regardless, there are more important things to worry about not ending in the U.S. than monument removals, as many commenters have pointed out to Schlapp. In fact, there are so many hilarious jokes about this Schlappin’ tweet that we had to make a whole list of them. Enjoy!
Jesus was a brown refugee, Yall would’ve put him in a cage. https://t.co/QR46cn3fmS— Bakari Sellers (@Bakari_Sellers) June 22, 2020
nah, we keeping the statues of Jesus.....that was the first black/brown man killed by a police state. https://t.co/zRQFaFIqfp— Amy 2.0, mother of unicorns. (@TheAimercat) June 22, 2020
why would we tear down the statue of a middle eastern socialist refugee? https://t.co/VIGhXyOmf4— Karen Chee (@karencheee) June 22, 2020
you’re not supposed to worship statues of Jesus anyway. Moses did a whole thing about it
— i bless the rains down in castamere (@Chinchillazllla) June 22, 2020
ATTACK AND DETHRONE GOD https://t.co/PislQY4twh— Talia Lavin (@chick_in_kiev) June 22, 2020
Jesus was killed by law enforcement. https://t.co/6k2w3NjvyU— Kazeem Famuyide 🍎 (@Kazeem) June 22, 2020
If Jesus were alive today, he'd be tearing down the statues of Jesus https://t.co/hjX8eSEQi4— BrooklynDad_Defiant! (@mmpadellan) June 22, 2020
Oh, honey . . . Jesus was dark skinned.— Mrs. Betty Bowers (@BettyBowers) June 22, 2020
The Confederates would have posted rewards for his recapture in the newspapers. https://t.co/AaoDMXjvrn
I’m pretty sure Jesus was against state-sanctioned oppression and violence. So I’ve heard, anyway. https://t.co/GGXkTNMdUk— Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg (@TheRaDR) June 22, 2020
Oh gosh, no worries! Yeah, those aren't ACTUALLY, like, statues of JESUS Jesus. No, those are all just some White guy. https://t.co/b7BSMrXIPw— Fiqah (@sassycrass) June 22, 2020
Nah. We ain’t tearing down images of peaceful Black people. https://t.co/YmR0fonoBq— Marcus Ferrell (@Marcus4America) June 22, 2020
Now look what you did Matt pic.twitter.com/jeTRSSlNa6
— Louise (@clwtweet) June 22, 2020
Jesus Christ, the Son of the Living God, PERSONALLY vandalized a temple when it elevated capital above the work of the Lord. God got His hands dirty to prove this point. God is on the side of liberation
— The Mountain Goats (@mountain_goats) June 22, 2020
accusing a jewish man of being the puppet-master behind antifa and blm, and then saying that antifa and blm are going to destroy statues of jesus, is a little too on the nose. https://t.co/KfOQA6v1WC— samantha/שֵׁײנָא✡️🏳️🌈🏴🚩 (@koshersemite) June 22, 2020
You know who wouldn't be too keen on statues of Jesus?— Ouaquaga on Chenango (@JnxOuaquaga) June 22, 2020
It we start separating religion and state, we’re going to slide right into having a Constitution or something. https://t.co/JRxrDSPONt— The Hoarse Whisperer (@HoarseWisperer) June 22, 2020
This happened 500 years ago. It was called the Reformation. https://t.co/i4EU9RV2GH— Binyamin Appelbaum (@BCAppelbaum) June 22, 2020
Ah yes, noted slave owner and child rapist Jesus Christ. https://t.co/PleeBXHaCv— The Volatile Mermaid (@OhNoSheTwitnt) June 22, 2020
Statues of Ronald McDonald are next. It won’t end. Pray for McDonald’s
— Trumpy Trumpy (parody) (@outofcontroljb) June 22, 2020
“Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the waters under the earth. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them” — I mean, if we’re getting technical about the whole thing.
— Elie Mystal (@ElieNYC) June 22, 2020
Where will this wanton statue destruction lead next? pic.twitter.com/xcDuZQkyIB
— Seth Masket (@smotus) June 22, 2020
Somebody get him a script. He’s lost the plot
— ☇RiotWomenn☇ (@riotwomennn) June 22, 2020
If there are publicly funded and displayed statues of Jesus in America, you're the one whose broken the law, Matt. https://t.co/r7hIsmq3TG— The Nerdskull (@aNerdskull) June 22, 2020