Elon Musk has been having quite the week and may be digging multiple graves for himself as his Twitter deal grows shakier by the day, reflected in the plunging value of Tesla’s stock price. To make matters worse, a flight attendant has come forward to accuse him of sexually harassing her by exposing himself and propositioning her for sex, then paying her $250,000 to keep quiet about it.

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Musk’s response to these very serious allegations have been to tweet that “political attacks” on him are coming after he was made aware of the story, call the woman a liar, and now to “challenge” her to describe his penis. No, really.

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“But I have a challenge to this liar who claims their friend saw me ‘exposed’ – describe just one thing, anything at all (scars, tattoos, …) that isn’t known by the public,” he tweeted. “She won’t be able to do so, because it never happened.”

There are two massive issues with this proposal aside from the legal issues it could cause. The first is that most people don’t have weird scars or tattoos in that general area of the body, and the second is that the only way to prove that he doesn’t have something strange going on down there is to show the world.

It seems exceedingly unlikely that the anonymous accuser will risk her safety from the Musk mob by publicly describing a penis she saw briefly one time against her will. Meanwhile, the billionaire’s critics are pushing him on the issue, widely asking him how weird his junk is that it would be so memorable and easily described.

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Others have pointed out that if the former SpaceX employee took up the challenge, she would be violating the non-disclosure agreement she signed in exchange for the money, and even wondered if the challenge voids the NDA anyway.

According to Business Insider, the Musk sexual harassment incident occurred in 2016 on a SpaceX private jet flight, during which a flight attendant was giving him a massage. He then exposed his genitals to her, rubbed her leg without consent, and offered to buy her a horse in exchange for an “erotic massage.” Apparently, she had also been encouraged to become a licensed masseuse for the explicit purpose of rubbing the human embodiment of failing upward on his special plane trips.

After contacting Musk to give him the chance to respond, he asked Insider for more time, then ghosted the reporters and instead posted to Twitter that everyone was about to be real mean to him.

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Musk also has a long history of fiercely weaponizing NDAs against employees and others whenever possible. Many find it amusing and/or exhausting that he claims to be a paragon of free speech, then silences people with legal documents, then publicly challenges them to break those agreements.

If anyone deserves to have his genitals mocked, it’s this guy.

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*First Published: May 20, 2022, 11:41 am