It sounds like a nightmare: you’re getting ready for your wedding when a friend spills a glass of red wine all over your white dress. How should you react?
One Redditor planned on walking down the aisle in her late mother’s gown — until a very careless bridesmaid did exactly that.
“I (27 F) got married a month ago. My dress was this long, lacy gown that my mom wore at her wedding. My mom passed away about 2 years ago. Because the dress was so important to me, I had a big plan to keep it safe from any damages. I would only wear the dress at the wedding itself, and I would switch to a more casual dress for the reception. When I was wearing the dress, I wouldn’t eat or drink anything except water, and I would stay inside at all times,” the OP writes.
“I promise I’m not usually this crazy about cleanliness, but this was my mom’s dress, and the thought of it being damaged broke my heart. But I also knew I wanted to wear it when I got married to have a piece of her with me. She adored this dress and always dreamed I would wear it. My bridesmaids knew very well about my particularities with the dress. I had a room above the venue where I was getting ready. My dress was hanging in a safe place in the room.”
“On the day of the wedding, I went down to check on something for the wedding, leaving my bridesmaids in the room. Here’s what happened, as they told it to me: They opened a bottle of Pinot Noir (my favorite) as a celebration. They poured themselves glasses and began to walk around checking out the room. One of my bridesmaids, ‘Anna,’ (27 F) wanted to get a closer look at my dress. She got really close to it, and she started touching the lace. Somehow, her hand holding the wine glass slipped, and wine spilled all over the bottom of the dress.”
“When I came upstairs, they told me what happened, and I started sobbing. My maid of honor called several professional cleaners, and they said there was no way they could get the dress in before the wedding. They told us ways to save the dress until we could get it into them, so my MOH started doing that. After that call, I became extremely angry. I asked ‘Anna’ what the hell she was doing holding red wine so close to my dress when she knew how careful I was being. She dismissed it and said it wasn’t such a big deal because I was planning to wear the dress, so it could have gotten damaged that way too.”
Instead of being incredibly apologetic and going out of her way to help, the bridesmaid basically said, “oh well, too bad!”
“I couldn’t believe she said that. I called her thoughtless and careless and stupid. I told her that she was no longer part of the wedding and that I wanted her to leave. She left, and neither of us have reached out to the other since.”
Was the bride a bridezilla for then kicking her friend out of the wedding?
“I got married in the dress I had planned to wear for the reception, and I was heartbroken not to be wearing my mom’s dress. After the wedding, my bridesmaids joked that I was a bridezilla for kicking ‘Anna’ out after she made a ‘honest mistake.’ I absolutely don’t think I’m the AH or a bridezilla because Anna’s reaction was so horrible and insincere. But I wanted to get the story off my chest and ask some people who might be more impartial, AITA?”
What do Redditors think? “Anna” was pretty callous about a sentimental heirloom.
“Why??? WHY would you wander around with a glass of wine next to a white wedding dress that had such extreme sentimental value?? NTA. I just. They couldn’t have waited? They couldn’t have waited to have wine? IMO, even if the dress wasn’t sentimental because of your mom, the fact that’s it’s your wedding dress automatically makes it VIP. It doesn’t seem bridezilla or OTT to take precautions not to have big, ugly stains on your wedding dress. And the fact that Anna didn’t seem sorry makes me feel like she deserved to be kicked out,” saidloloannd.
“Even if they couldn’t have waited for the wine, why are they running around the room with the glasses in hand? Are you telling me there wasn’t a single table for them to put their glasses on? And even, a wedding dress costs a ton of money and it’s supposed to be worn for exactly this one only moment in your entire life. OP was lucky to have a spare dress, but what would someone do if they didn’t have any? Marry in Jeans and a baggy shirt? Man, I hope my future wedding party will have enough senses in their brain to not mess with white stuff,” statedTitariia.
“One of my friends has a wedding photo taken after the formal shots with bridemaids were taken. She is COVERED in napkins, from neck to toe, because she was starving (too nervous to have breakfast) and so they got a McDonald’s drive-thru for her to eat. But obviously, grease risk. So the bridesmaids made damn sure that not a speck or crumb would get on her. OPs bridesmaids all suck for never, at any point, going ‘Hey, this might be a bad idea,’ let alone trying to defend Anna afterwards,” observedNannyOggsKnickers.
“NTA at all. After that call, I became extremely angry. I asked “Anna” what the hell she was doing holding red wine so close to my dress when she knew how careful I was being. She dismissed it and said it wasn’t such a big deal because I was planning to wear the dress, so it could have gotten damaged that way too. This right here is why I believe you were justified. If I was Ana, I would have been absolutely mortified and would have been apologizing profusely to you. (I also would never have red wine near a wedding dress, especially one that holds so much sentimental value),” saidstraightaspasta
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